Before I even became pregnant I thought I would be a “Pinterest” Mom, actually I strove to be one. Everyone knows the type, some look down on them and some (like myself) look up to them. I should have know before the baby even arrived that I would not be a Pinterest mom.
We were living in a small two bedroom, one bath apartment with an ocean view. It was the perfect place to start our married life together. However, once we got pregnant the place got very small very quickly. There was no hall closet, no garage, we had shared laundry and a steep flight of stairs to our apartment. We had been looking for a house for almost a year when she was born and needless to say, there was no nursery, she had one drawer allocated for her clothes, in my husbands dresser. So basically she started out living in our house the same way I did, with just a drawer and place to sleep.
Our first born was only 5 months old when we bought our first house together, with two stories, a garage, backyard and multiple bathrooms. I thought my Pinterest mom life would start then, since I had room to do all the pinteresty stuff. Well it didn’t, it took me a year…a WHOLE year after moving in to “finish” her nursery. By the time I was “done” she was closer to 2 and the nursery dreams I had didn’t work as well for a toddler. I had a running to do list of stuff for the house to get it to look like it did on my favorite Pinterest board.
3 years later, I am still not done, I almost finished picking pictures for my gallery wall over the holiday break 3 months ago. I just need to get them printed, mounted and hung, oh and buy the frames. The dream of being a Pinterest mom has mostly died, but I do get jealous when I see other moms making leprechaun traps with green footprints on the toilet seat, having season appropriate milestone pictures, pin worthy baby painting sessions or the perfect looking nursery that still makes me swoon.
As I let go of the mother I thought I would be, I focus on the mother I am. I am a mom who loves to bake with my daughter, despite the mess it can make; who loves to stay in bed as long as my toddler will let us and cuddle (dog included) on the weekends; a mom who gets on the floor to play with my girls for hours, to read (often the same story) for as long as she wants me to; to go for a walk and pick flowers along the way taking an hour to go 1/2 a mile; the mom who may not have her gallery wall done, but who will show pictures of her kids any chance she gets; the mom who will let her children run around the house and backyard naked and get dirty and the mom who is actually okay not being the Pinterest mom as it seems like a lot of pressure. Learning to be the mother I am verses the mother I thought I was going to be, is not easy, but the more I let go of her, the better in the moment mom I am.
One day I will have my gallery wall done and I promise to not only blog about it but to also make a pin of it for Pinterest. Oh did I mention my “new” baby is ten months and her nursery isn’t done either!